“If Americans can be divorced for ‘incompatibility of temper’, I cannot conceive why they are not all divorced.  I have known many happy marriages, but never a compatible one.  The whole aim of marriage is to fight through and survive the instant when incompatibility becomes unquestionable.  For a man and a woman, as such, are incompatible.”

From “Chesterton Day by Day: The Wit and Wisdom of G. K. Chesterton” by Michael W. Perry

1. One out of every two marriages ends in divorce.

2. In 1991, only 50.8% of American children were living with a mother and a father.  The numbers have worsened since that study.

3. Approximately 4% of American children are living only with their father.

4. The vast majority of children who are raised in a two-parent home will never be poor during childhood.  By contrast, the vast majority of children who spend time in a single-parent home will experience poverty.

5. Children from female-headed homes are five times as likely to be poor as children in two-parent families.

6. Four times as many divorced women with children fell under the poverty line than married women with children.

7. Children from disrupted marriages experience greater risk of injury, asthma, headaches, and speech defects than children from intact families.

8. Suicide rates for children of divorce are measurably higher than for children from intact families.

9. Children of divorce were found to be twice as likely as chidren from intact families to drop out of school.

10. Young adults ages 18-22 from disrupted families were found to be twice as likely to have poor relationships with their mothers and/or fathers, and that the effects were still evident 12-22 years after the breakup.

11. Divorced adults, particularly divorced men, experience early health problems to a measurably greater extent than married individuals.  Premature death rates for divorced men double that of marriend men from such cuases as cardiovascular disease, hypertension, and strokes.

12. The suicide rate for divorced white men was four times higher than for their married counterparts.

13. Divorced or separated men undergo inpatient or outpatient psychiatric care at a rate of 10 times more than married men.  Divorced or separated women’s usage of such care increased fivefold.

The conclusion of the article was that divorce adversely affects children, women, men, and society as a whole.

The ground is soggy.  Old leaves pack in among the bushes looking barren now without their leaves.  How like this are the seasonal moods of the soul — now muddy, now bright, now soggy, needing the warming light of God’s presence!  All we can do is notice, gaze, and see the bare truth of our situation.

I stand in my inner garden and in the actual garden.  There is so much work to do, but I know the time for action is not yet.  My arms hang by my sides.  The tools are in the basket.  I try hard to believe the old saying, “They also serve who only stand and wait.”

The air feels metallic.  It’s time to go inside again, into more waiting.”

“With or without your hard work God is always moving in your life.  Wait on the Holy.  Wait and receive the gifts that come.”

From A Mystic Garden by Gunilla Norris

Michael Horton’s little book, “Too Good To Be True: Finding Hope In a World of Hype” reminds us that when we expect only blessings in life, we’re locked in a vicious cycle of desire and disillusionment.  “We need to find our solace in the real God, not an imaginary-friend version that we have created out of the trends and catch-phrases of the world around us.”

This is a powerful little book that clears away the chatter of our culture, and replaces it with nourishing truth!

What do we do when we wait?  Plan?  Fidget?  Fret?  Dream?  Rest?  Pace?  Why is it so hard to do nothing?  The simplest, easiest thing is to let things be.  Why not just “be” in the sun this little moment.  Perhaps when we do nothing we see how naked we feel without plans?  Perhaps we feel useless without our goals?”    (From: “A Mystic Garden” by Gunilla Norris)

Of all the spiritual disciplines, solitude and silence is often the most difficult — and can be the most fruitful.  For learning more about the depth and beauty of “being”, check out Ruth Haley Barton’s powerful little book:  “Invitation to Solitude and Silence”.